Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
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