Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
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At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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