i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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