No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Watching her eat just hurts me
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize