batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
