I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
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