imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
So vagazzling was a success
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
