I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
