P.S. I can't hear my feet
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
