Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
