how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
