I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
