yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
