my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
