FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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