Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
