remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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