you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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