Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
