doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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