i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
