Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
