; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
