In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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