hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
