I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
