Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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