she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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