I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
