Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
