lets start a swedish sibling band together
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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