nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Randomize