I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize