and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
