my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
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I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
wow bdsm is so cute
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