she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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