where does the pee come out of this thing
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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