I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
stop calling my apartment porn island.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
