he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
