I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
