So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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