I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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