Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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