White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
barbara walters just said penis...
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
it's like iHOP with fire
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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