i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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