And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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