Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
