we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
