Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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