You just made me feel so damn special
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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